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From a fellow House fan:
It’s a Wheel O’ Wisdom: “Are friends sick of your complaints? Doctors no longer returning your calls? If you’re absolutely certain life is terminal, ‘Yes, You’re Probably Dying’ is for you. By matching a common symptom to its worst-case medical scenario, you can efficiently indulge in health panic. Say you have a headache – why not assume you’ve got a brain tumour, contact the appropriate specialist, then begin worrying about imminent hair loss?”

My favourite example?

Joint Pain
You may have: Lupus
Which is: Chronic autoimmune disease
Specialist to see: Immunologist
In the meantime, obsess about: Heart strain
But it’s probably just: Knuckle cracking

Second-runner up has to be cough – could be tuberculosis, probably just a cold. Or lethargy – could be leukemia, probably just laziness.

Thanks Lizzim!