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I meant to write about how Vancouver TV writers and wannabes should come to the Writers Talking TV event I’m moderating with creator/showrunner Simon Barry of Continuum on Tuesday, but it sold out quickly (well, free-ed out, since there’s no charge). That’s a testament to the popularity of the show specifically and sci-fi generally, and the fact that it’s a small venue — the better for writers to get an intimate discussion about the series origins, the rules of the world he’s created and how those rules play out in the Continuum writers room and on the page.

Because people are people and Vancouverites are Vancouverites, there will be inevitable no-shows so there also will be a rush line. If you want to join, the event is on Tuesday, February 12 at 7 pm in Room 1800 of SFU’s Harbour Centre in downtown Vancouver.

The event it about Continuum, not me – my job is to get Simon to do all the talking. But looking forward to moderating a filled-to-capacity event without losing sleep for ages beforehand is one of those moments of personal reflection of how far I’ve come from younger, shyer, anxious-er Diane, from the young girl who took the bus several stops too far to avoid asking her seatmate to move, and the high school student whose English teacher jokingly recommended taking a muscle relaxant before presentations and encouraged me not to jump out of a window during oral examinations.

I’m not saying I won’t be nervous on the day — I’m not dead inside — but I’m more able to see that the event isn’t about me, that I care far more about my own stumbles than anyone else, and that years of putting myself in positions where I had to speak up have led to being slightly more comfortable speaking up, and more able to hide my anxiety.

This isn’t a new epiphany – I wrote about it more extensively several years ago – but I’m constantly amazed at the proof that slowly, surely, I can become more like the person I want to be, more like the person I feel is underneath the me that developed out of circumstance.

There have been people in my life who have used analysis and criticism of my character to try to encourage me to be more like the person they want me to be, and it’s only fairly recently that I’ve had the epiphany that I define friendship as those who accept me and encourage me on the path of being even more me. And yet again, I find myself grateful to have so many people in my life who do, and so many opportunities to explore along the path.

And holy cow did this get sappy from the beginning of talking about the event, but it’s the small adventures in my life right now that make me grateful that this is my life.

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